Mother Flipper

If there is one thing in this world that I love, it's singing.

If there is one thing in this world that I suck at, it's singing.

So that blows.

I think I need to take signing lessons so that Sweet Pea and I can make beautiful music together.

Another thing I need is a vacation.

And blueberry cheesecake.

If anyone can help me out with any of that....

You're more than welcome.

Crap

I had this super badass post in mind, but then I started watching 'How I Met Your Mother' and forgot what I was going to say.

But dude, you really should watch this show. I literally go from laughter to tears often.

When I say literally, I literally mean literally.

Sometimes I say something like, "When I hear Blake Shelton's 'Who Are You When I'm Not Looking," I literally want to punch a baby. Even though babies are gross, I'm not really going to punch it.

Point being, I literally go from laughter to tears often when watching 'How I Met Your Mother.' Not like 'stub your toe tears,' but like choke up a little bit.

Also, gentlemen, the females on this show are hot. Even the ginger. THE GINGER IS HOT! If a hot ginger isn't enough to get you to watch a television program, nothing I say here is going to convince you.

And the fellers in this show are hilarious, all characters play off each other well.

Anyway friends, If I remember what I was going to post, I'll probably put in on The Book. Or Tweet it. Keep an eye out.

 Also, I'm totally going to start referring to Facebook as 'The Book,' so feel free to help me get that going.

Shake Weights

Not because they look nasty.
Well, not ONLY because they look nasty.
But they're stupid, have you ever used one? There is like serious strategy involved. It's not easy. Not easy at all.

Anyone

Does anyone read this blog?

Don't know, don't care.

Actually, it's even better if no one does. 

Because then, I really can say anything I want. Anything at all.

Respect

I respect people, not titles. I respect everyone until they give me a reason not to. And once it's lost,  it's almost impossible to get it back.

Tonight

Lupe Fiasco with the Sperry boys and Maveric. I'm pretty freakin' pumped ha ha

On Rare Occasions

Good things actually do happen.

I finally got into sporting goods, which is what I've always wanted since starting at Wally clear back im November. And, it's full time. Which rocks.

I'm ready for this bum leg to heal up, though. I want to hit the lake. I'm also sick of limping all over the place ha ha.

Walmart

Who says you can't have fun at work?

Really?

Grow the hell up.
You two are ridiculous.

Sleep.

I hate that I can't sleep. Ever.
It's 1:32 and I'm not tired. Not even a little bit tired.
Last night, I was up til 5. Then I woke up at 8.
The day before that, I was up til like 7.
I just can't sleep. I hate it. I hate it so bad.

Cappie

I miss him.

Stupid

you very well might be the dumbest person ive ever met.

if i try to blog from my phone... i cant do any capitalization or punctuation... except periods.
so yeah... this post probably looks really dumb.

its hard to come up with life lessons when youre stuck on the couch all day.

im feeling hateful and pecemistic today.

my phone also doesnt have spell check when i blog for some unknown reason.

and my leg stings like hell.

Three weeks

I can't go boating for three weeks.

I hate that.

I hate that bad.

Word.

Being alone

I feel like I'm alone all the time.

Google+

That stuff is badass.

I can take a picture on my phone and it's automatically on my Google+, not for everyone to see, but for me to. Then with a click of two buttons, I can make it public to my Google+. Two more clicks and it's on my blog. It's so sick, I don't need to send it or upload it or anything.

When that shiz goes public. Ya'll are gonna flip :)

Zack's Life lessons #5

Legs and boat propellers don't mix.

Trust me, I learned this the hard way.

So this is as I was getting my stitches. You probably notice the big gash on my knee first... it was pretty bad, but not the worst. You can see on my calf where it's stitched up, yeah, that boy was bad. Much worse than the one on my knee. I wish we'd gotten a picture before he stitched that one up, but before he numbed up my leg, I wasn't too concerned about getting a picture.

A few hours after, I decided to change my bandages and took a look at the damage. The big one on my knee still looks worse, but its not. The one on my calf is stinging much worse than the knee still. 

I ended up with 25 stitches, which I think is pretty impressive.

As I was getting stitched up, the nurse came in and warned the doctor about the next patient coming in. I'm not going to go into too much detail, but after he did the stitches on my calf, I ended up waiting about an hour for a different doctor to come in and finish up the other two while the first doctor went to help the next patient.

I laid there thinking about the next patient and how lucky I was to be in the situation I was in. I saw the family of the next patient come in and saw the pain they were in. It really got me thinking. Life is just way too short and everything can be flipped completely upside down in a matter of seconds. I was so blessed that all I got was three cuts on my leg. The propeller could have done so much worse to me than that and my family and I could have been in the same situation the young man after me was in.

I don't know, I guess I've just been really blessed in my life. I've been four car accidents that easily could have taken my life. I don't remember any of it, but my parents have told me many times about how blessed I am to have survived the problems I had as a baby...

I've had my heartbroken twice and I thought it was the worst thing that could possibly happen.

I wrecked my dream truck after only having it for two months.

Bad choices on both ends led me to losing one of the people I've been closest with for my entire life.

But I'm alive. My family is alive and things could just be so much worse. Three of those four accidents were with family members and any of us easily could have been taken.

I'm just so grateful that I've been blessed and watched over and I'm going to try my best never to take important things in my life for granted.

That's the biggest life lesson yet ;)

Zack's Life Lessons #4

Insanity is doing the same thing, the same way and expecting different results.

Zack's Life Lessons #3

Whoever shows the least amount of interest holds the most amount of power.

Zack's Life Lessons #2

Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to.

Zack's Lifes Lessons #1

Don't shit where you eat.

How's that for Chicken Soup for your soul?

New.

How about a new segment ladies and gentlemen.

I'm going to try to give you all a thought daily.

Keep checking in, fools,

I also have some stuff to tell ya'll about.

I haven't told many people, but a really hard thing happened to me the other day.
My dog, Cappie, died.
It was really sudden.
One night, he was looking somewhat sick, so I gave him some worm medicine. He looked much better and was really acting like himself and looking great the next day.
The following day, I went outside to feed him and he looked terrible. He wouldn't move or eat and just looked at me. It broke my heart. My dad and I rushed to the store to get more medicine and by the time we returned, it was too late.

This hurt. Worse than when I wrecked my truck and probably could even be compared to when Jamee and I broke up. Cappie was the first dog that I actually took care of. In the past, I've let my dad feed the dogs and let him take the time to play with them. Cappie was different. We spent every second possible together. I trained him, and played with him every chance I got. We spent hours a day together and it really hurt to lose him.

Anyway, I hate that. He was an amazing dog and it just doesn't seem fair. I don't exactly know how what happened and I don't think it's fair. I know he's in a better place now so I guess this is for the best.

GIRLS.

When it rains, it pours.

I feel a lot of anger and hatred tonight.
I better just bite me tongue.

Hatred today.

 I HATE that Ryan Dunn is dead :/

I hate that one of my best friends in the world lives in St. George. And another one is moving there next week.

I hate that my amazing, beautiful truck is just as dead as Ryan Dunn :/

Fuh

I hate that I'm not on Catalina Island anymore. Probably my favorite place in the whole world. I honestly don't know if I'll ever vacation anywhere but there again. 

I honestly feel almost homesick for it.

Difficulty

I'm having a hard time thinking of things to hate these days. Don't ask me why. Guess it's a good thing, right?

Sean Kingston.

There's one, at least.

Television

Alright fellow children of the 90s....
Remember the great shows we grew up with?

Boy Meets World
Smart Guy
Even Stevens
Hey Arnold
Rugrats
Brotherly Love
The Amanda Show
All That
Doug
Lizzy McGuire

I could go all day... We had some great ones.

WTH has happened?

Now there are like 463 versions of the Suite Life.
All these TV shows are becoming the exact same.
And they all SUCK.
Disney and Nick have gone straight downhill.
I truly feel bad for the children these days.
I fear for my children and the crap that will be on TV when they come into this messed up world.

You know what else has gone downhill?
Disney movies.
Remember how great the classics were?
Incredible.
It's just not the same... this is one place that technology has screwed us over.
I miss the good old days.

Guess What I Hate

Ugly celebrities!
Don't lie, I'm not the only one!

Here's a list of some ugly ones. No particular order. Just some ugly celebs

C'mon. You knew she was gonna make the list. 

There's no denying that she is gross.

UGH.

He's ugly as the Joker, but he's really ugly as Jack Nicholson.

AAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

He's way ugly and way scary

You know he's ugly.

Sorry mom.

Good thing you're rich.

Hermione could do WAY better.

(Like me)

Glad you're Mormon. You're still ugly, Dog.

Okay, I could go all night. I could list off tons and tons of ugly celebs. But that's not necessary... you get the point. 

If you're gonna be famous... you damn well better be attractive!

(Sorry again about the language, mom.) 

Waiting :/

World.

Would it really be a bad thing if the world ended tomorrow?
No.
What's really so great about this place anyway?
We wouldn't have to deal with stuff like gas prices anymore.

I Will Now Publicly Admit To Being A Hypocrite.

Utah Fans


BYU Fans


Redsox Fans


Yankees Fans


Hate 'em.

Have you ever experienced this?

Yankees fan will be shown in blue, Redsox fan in red.

(Man shows up in Yankees hat)

"Your hat is gay. Yankees blow."
"You are gay. You blow."
"Yeah you wish, 'cause you're gay just like A-rod and Jeter."
"They aren't gay. You're just mad 'cause your team sucks."
"Acutally, they don't suck. Remember when we won the World Series that one time?"
"Remember when we won the World Series all those times?"
"That's just 'cause you bought your team."
"Still counts."
"No it doesn't."
"Why?"
"'Cause the Yankees Suck."


Both characters were quite annoying, am I right?

Here's another one.

BYU fan in blue, Utah in red.

"B-Y-WHO? B-Y-WHO?"
"Oh sorry that your team is terrible so you think that it makes you cool that there is a U in BYU."
"Actually, UTAH rocks and BYU sucks."
"Ha, that's funny seeing as how Utah is actually the team that sucks."
"The only good thing ever associated with BYU is Jimmer."
"4th & 18. Enough said."


BYU fans think that just saying 4th & 18 is enough to prove that BYU is, has been and always will be the better team. That is clearly not the case. Granted, it was a good play.

I think you get the point.
It's annoying, it is possible to have an intelligent conversation about sports with a fan of a rival team.
But when you just sit and rag on each other saying the other team sucks or is gay without saying anything about their actually performance on the field, that's just dumb.

I don't like this. I really don't.

H.A.T.E.

Constant negativity.

I have to make a serious effort to stay positive these days, but I try. It makes it hard when people only complain. I have plenty of things to complain about, but I try to keep it positive.


Here's my pet peeve


Me- "Hey! How are you?"
Insert name here- "Terrible."
Me- "What's wrong?"
Insert name here- "Everything."

You're lucky this is via text/Facebook. If we were face to face, I would literally punch you in the side of the head.



I can list off a ton of stuff that makes me feel terrible. I've got some stuff going on that if I crawled in a hole and stayed for a month, I'd be perfectly justified.

Do I dwell on that? Do I try to put my problems on you? No. No I don't.

I try to stay positive. I take walks when it's sunny and when it's rainy, I sometimes go sit in and enjoy the smell.

Being negative is going to make it impossible for positive things to happen.



From now on, when people are constantly negative, I'm just going to delete from my world.



Okay, before I finish, I'm gonna stress the word CONSTANTLY. I don't know your life, bad stuff happens.

I honestly feel bad for anyone who has things going on that makes them sad. Sometimes you're just sad, or upset. But when you're always dwelling on the bad, you're just making things worse for yourself.

How about be happy that you're alive. If that's the only good thing in your life, you're still pretty freaking blessed.

For real?

PEOPLE: Don't go through the 20 items or less lane with more than 20 items. A few reasons.

1. This is supposed to go fast, people with only a few items shouldn't have to wait as long. It's that simple.
2. There's no belt and half as many bags. There's just not room for all of your items. ESPECIALLY if you aren't going to help put them back in the cart. YOU'RE SCREWING MY IPH!
3. You're not better than everyone else like you think you are, what makes you think you're above the rules?

The sign says, "20 Items or less" not "Oh, I'm sure we're close to 20 items"
Especially when your cart is full. Clearly more than twenty, beast.

Next time you say, "I have more than 20 items, but all the other lines are so long. I don't want to wait", I'm going to punch you in the face.

The 6 people in line behind you with 4 items each don't want to wait for me to ring your 48 items through. What makes you better than them?

I have room for three bags on here... if you're going to come through the 20 items or less line with 56 items, at least take your crap or I'm gonna start throwing your shiiiii on the floor.

Follow up.

My good friend, Tessa, asked why I dislike "Mama's Song", so I've decided to do a follow up explaining the dishonorable mentions.

"White Liar"- Miranda Lambert (Shelton?)- Typical, hypocritical woman. Plus, her voice bugs me in this one.

"Need You Now"- Lady Antebellum- I like Country 'cause it's good music. This is just a gay booty call hookup song. Might as well rap it.

"This"- Darius Rucker- Simply missing a stop light didn't change your whole life, Hooty. Maybe if you got stopped at a red light, and then a bomb gets dropped right where your car is, that would work. But that clearly didn't happen.

"Look It Up"- Ashton Sheperd- The word is "annoying", look it up. It means a stupid country song that no one likes.

Get it?

"Mama's Song"- Carrie Underwood- "He makes promises he keeps, no he's never gonna leave..." You don't know that. "He is good, so good..." Stupid lyric.

"That Don't Impress Me Much"- Shania Twain- Guaranteed if he was Brad Pitt, you'd be impressed.

Actually, all Shania Twain songs.

"This Kiss"- Faith Hill- I'm willing tho bet that Faith doesn't understand the majority of words in this song.

"Goodbye Earl"- Dixie Chicks- Do I really need to explain this? First off, the Dixie Chicks are douche bags. Automatically making their music SUCK. 

Clearly, if you call the cops to report your husband for being abusive and he goes missing at the same time... you're the first suspect.

TAKE THEM AWAY, OFFICERS!

Oh wait... Toby Keith did that for them! ha ha

Worst Country Songs Ever Written.

You've probably already read this on Facebook. I'm gonna go into a little more explanation here.

I'll admit, these probably aren't the worst country songs EVER WRITTEN. I'm sure there are many terrible country songs that I haven't heard. This is a list of country songs I don't like and are on my mind at the moment. For the sake of the blog, we're calling them the worst country songs ever written.

We'll go for the top 5.

5

"Turn On the Radio"- Reba McEntire

Okay, Reba... First of all you're old, you're a ginger, and you're just not that attractive. I can almost guarantee that there is no one that is trying that hard for your "love." Granted, you may have a stalker or two due to the fame, but clearly this song is about something deeper than that.

I would also like to point out that the man in this video is young and ripped to shreds. I don't think you're quite his type, Grandma.

I'm the first to admit that I'm a Reba fan. She's talented and actually somewhat funny. The song is just really stupid.

4

"This Ain't No Love Song"- Trace Adkins

Alright, I'm a fan of the guy. He's obviously a badass (sorry mom.) He's got some great songs and really is talented. 

This song is just dumb. Really, it's just dumb. I get it, Trace. The double negative admitting that it really is a love song, you really are stalking her just saying you're not... I get it. I like the idea. Just not your best work. 

Easily deserves the number 4 spot.

I'll give you this much though, great video. 

3

"Why Wait?"- Rascal Flatts

For obvious reasons, I consider Rascal Flatts the boy band of country. Except for one thing: I LIKE BOY BANDS. Lead singer, Gary LeVox, is clearly French. Why the heck are you singing my country's music? 

cough*kiethurban*cough

Okay, that clearly isn't a big issue, I just wanted a chance to say something bad about Kieth Urban. I also intentionally spelled his name wrong, for no other reason than I just don't like him.

Gary, all I'm saying is maybe lose the dyke spikes.

My biggest issue with this song is the music video. Don't try to make a play on The Hangover. That clearly deserves a punch from Mike Tyson, or a crow bar smack from Leslie Chow. The song doesn't fit the movie. 

You're wasting a lot of time writing, recording and performing this song. What are you waiting for? 

Okay guys, forever is not a given. Don't say that. 

I'm sure her mom is going to mind you "saving her the trouble." I'm also willing to bet that her dad would kick your butt for, "saving him a bundle." What kind of family doesn't want to see their baby girl's wedding?

I'm still not positive if this song was written about a girl. It seems highly likely to me that it was written for a man and then maybe changed around a bit to make it for a girl, so that country music would accept it. Just my theory. 

Anyway, terrible song.

2

"Stuck Like Glue"- Sugarland

"Gag me with a spoon!" That is the only phrase I can think of that is dumb enough to be used to describe this horrible, terrible, disgusting, repulsive song. I truly don't understand what would possess lead singer, Jennifer Nettles, to attempt that "rap." 

I'm having a personal debate whether or not to refer to it as rap. I'm not a rap fan. But I don't feel like it has done anything bad enough for that terrible noise to fall into the same category. 

I feel bad for guitarist, Kristian Bush. The man has talent, he can play, sing and even has some swagger. He could do better, truly. I can't blame founding member, Kristen Hall, for leaving the group. No, she may not be well known or famous these days, but at least she doesn't have to deal with that annoying lady anymore. 

The video is stupid, the song is creepy. I think that is one we can all agree on.

1

"Who Are You When I'm Not Lookin'?"- Blake Shelton

Brace yourselves people. This might get nasty.

If you have a baby or small child, be sure that he or she is no where near me when this song begins to play. As soon as the song begins, I get an uncontrollable urge to punch a baby. Honestly, maybe kick a puppy or light your flowers on fire. I hate it. I hate it so bad. 

I honestly have no idea why. There is no reason for me to hate it so bad. I hate it. I love Blake Shelton, but I hate this song. I hate it more than I hate the Taliban. Possibly more than I hate the Red Sox. Yes, friends, this hatred is deep. 

This song is the biggest disgrace to country music since the Dixie Chicks. 

I want to punch Blake Shelton in the face because he recorded this song. 

It's an embarrassment, not only to country music, but to both the Country and to all music in general.

Alright guys, it's time for some dishonorable mentions. I won't go into detail, I'll just list these off for ya.

"White Liar"- Miranda Lambert (Shelton?)

"Need You Now"- Lady Antebellum

"This"- Darius Rucker

"Look It Up"- Ashton Sheperd

"Mama's Song"- Carrie Underwood

"That Don't Impress Me Much"- Shania Twain

Actually, all Shania Twain songs.

"This Kiss"- Faith Hill

"Goodbye Earl"- Dixie Chicks

And every other Sugarland song!

If you have any questions as to why any of these received dishonorable mentions. Feel free to ask :)

Let's get it started.

I trust that the only reason you stumbled across my blog is because we are Facebook friends. Well, I've decided to begin blogging so I have more room to express myself. Hopefully cut down on the status updates you all seem to hate so much ;)

Basically, I'm going to use this blog to explain why I hate things that I hate. That's it. Maybe I'll sneak some other things in every once in a while, but the main point is to just complain and explain. That way, I won't be complaining just to complain... get it? Complain and explain. That probably won't seem so clever when I re-read this in the morning.

I'm gonna go ahead and refer to the title of my blog:
Things I Hate: Agree or get off my blog.

You clearly have TWO options.
Option 1- Agree.
I prefer this option

Option 2- Get off my blog.

Option 3- Disagree but stay anyway.




Just kidding. Option 3 is fine.


Also, a little later on, I make a post about negativity. You may think this is a negative blog, due to the fact that it is about things I hate. That is not the case. While this may seem negative, it is all in good fun. I hope you can see the difference.

While sometimes I may be negative (refer to my Walmart post), I hope you won't think that I'm hypocritical. Read both posts and I think it's clear to see that that is not the case, at least I hope so.

I thought the nice background and beautiful dog photos would add a bit of joy to the hatred  :)

Anyway, thanks for reading :)